Your Ex and the Volcano You’re Hiding

There they are again. Every Sunday you see them. Only on Sunday though. You do everything you can to avoid being in the same room with them any other time.

Of course you would; that’s the person who hurt you. You can’t think about it without cringing inwardly. You can feel your blood pressure rising with the memories of their betrayal. But you keep that smile-mask firmly in place. This is church, after all. And they are who they are. A veritable paragon of the institution. The other attendees would be hard-pressed to believe that someone so respected could have injured you so deeply; surely you’re making more of this than really happened. But even if you could prove it — make them see this friend for the fiend you know them to be — what good would it do? It wouldn’t salve your broken heart. Your bitterness has already dug down too deep.

So you say hello with all the self-respect and dignity you can muster. You fake pleasantries. You imitate assent at the praises they receive from others. You keep the seething venom in your heart buried there, poisoning only yourself, because it is un-Christian to spew it all over the rest of the congregation. But you know. And, you imagine, they know you know. The thought burns like fire, but you hold on to the twisted hope that when their comeuppance finally arrives they won’t be able to deny that their sins against you led to their downfall. You certainly won’t deny it.

You know how to fake your way through church associations, and hide those awful feelings against your ex: ex-spouse, ex-boyfriend or girlfriend, ex-friend, ex-associate, ex-whomever. You may know you’re not all right (or even alright), but you know that they hurt you and you wait for your vindication. But what it your ex — the one by whom you feel so wrong and injured and are just waiting for justice to be exposed — is God? Have you learned how to deal with anger and bitterness against the only One who can bring the vindication you crave? What are you going to do?

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5 thoughts on “Your Ex and the Volcano You’re Hiding

  1. I don’t write many responses, but after browsing a lot of responses on this page Your Ex and the Volcano Youre Hiding | AnotherJoy Writes. I do have a couple of questions for you if it’s allright.
    Could it be only me or does it look like like a few of the remarks come across like they are left by brain dead people?
    😛 And, if you are posting on other places, I’d like to follow everything new you have to post. Would you make a list of all of your social community sites like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?

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